fear

Don’t write about me.
You don’t have the heart or the guts or the courage
To persist for very long before you melt
Like plastic in the fire.
I will consume you.
I will destroy you.
You will grow weak and you will grow thin.
I will watch you collapse into yourself.
And I will not give you a second thought.

Don’t write about me.
I’ve let you believe for quite some time
You have me tamed
Under control, nice and neat
Exactly where you want me.
But I am chaos,
And I am proud.
If I please, I will run wild.
I will torment you
Until all will has left your body,
Until your throat is too dry to scream,
And you are just a thread.

Don’t write about me.
You don’t have the words
So the sensations,
They will seep from your face,
A nice, slow stream at first
But they will change to roaring waters.
Before you know it, you’ll be drowning.
They will sprout from your stomach,
Little seedlings, small and delicate,
Full of promise.
But they will grow into tangled vines,
Strong and wicked.
And they will grab you by the wrists and by the ankles,
And they will tear you limb by limb.

Don’t write about me.
Let me sit under your skin
Like I have since you were young,
Taking me with you where you went,
Me always humming, never gone.
A parasitic symbiosis.
Don’t you summon me or I will come.
I will emerge and I will conquer.
I will stomp and I will crush you.
Unrelenting, unforgiving.
You will lie crumpled at my feet.
Mostly nothing, hardly there.
A more miserable existence.

Don’t write about me.
I am your master, you are not mine.
You’d like to think it opposite,
But any fences, any locks, and any walls
You’ve used to keep me out
I’ve mercifully let you have–
A false sense of stability.
It’s done you well, but do not tempt me.
I am cruel and I am vicious.
And you will wish
You’d let me be.

Don’t write about me.
I am greedy and I am hungry.
Bottomless and boundless,
I will swallow you whole.
I will lick my lips and ask for more
And more and more
Until you have nothing left to give,
Until you have nothing left to be
But haunted.

Don’t write about me.
I will shatter every light you’ve ever witnessed
And blow out every star.
I will hunt you in a darkness
Blacker than you could describe.
I will grab you by the heart
As its beat grow loud and rapid.
I will shake it as I speak every nightmare that’s laid dormant into life
Right before your wide eyes.
They will be vivid and they will be graphic.
They will stain your retinas with their smiles.
Forever circling you as we dance,
Their movements unpredictable and violent.
And you will never dream again.

Don’t write about me.

Please.

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